Mite busting in the land of meadows

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They are coming.
The little mite guarding the drawers at LEMeB
rushed inside to convey this bitter news with
much remorse to the seniors who have been
laying eggs meticulously, day and night in
the narrow labyrinths where there are old-fashioned
HPLC syringes and stainless steel
filters and many other items that many
not know what they are for, are stored.

[]

They see with much trepidation
their hard-worked homes being
destroyed. On a second thought,
they also understand the pain
they have gain to our dear Cila
who had to disinfect the many
a drawer here and there in between questions
from Vijay, Raqu or Essa.

{}

An innocuous question from Vijay
asking where the machine’s filters are kept
pointed out to yet another house that we have built
in an uninvited place. And so the mite speaks

The mites knew ‘They’ are coming,
but they were also trying the jetinho Brasileiro way.
They knew the mite busters will take a few months to come,
As Cila needs three quotes, which will be approved
by Mr. Palmeira sitting on the third floor of the administration building
in Reitoria.

[]

Cila mutters furiously,
for Goodness sake, I just want to
bust the mites and there is so much bureaucracy in just asking the
mite buster to come.

Meanwhile, Ifa was calming Cila down and
consoled her with befitting stories from the past.
How they obtained the finest woods that are pre-treated
so that the mites would be repelled. But now…
old is gold indeed and we all agreed.

[]

And then Bert started to speak:

You see we live in a time of planned obsolescence.
Things are made to last for a 3-4 years
and thereafter, we are asked to purchase the software
or hardware;

there we go again, trying to
write a grant to obtain the funding which will (or may not) come
in a couple of years time; meanwhile these new instruments will become obsolete,
will be placed in a cupboard and not touched,

& then the termites
will come and feast and then Cila will have to go Reitoria,
and the mite busters will arrive, and such things as these continue
for as long as we live in cycles and loops.

And man, how can we work !

===

Back in the corridor, we can hear

André grumbling ‘When can we publish if we are busy writing grants and busting mites ?’

Pen is mightier than a sword, it is said.
(actually someone rewrote this in Orwellian parlance: The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp.)

And then he wrote to everyone that quality matters
and not quantity.

The mites were really getting worried. This meant that
the lab members at LEMeB will find creative ways to solve problems,
open all the drawers where these very mites live and they will be busted
by a PhD student or a postdoc.

And they would not need this blasted bureaucracy and proudly
proclaim:

“We will only manage to be good teachers and good researchers if we decrease our current bureaucratic load. Whenever you can, do not agree with new rules that simply lead to an increase in bureaucracy.”

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